The first time you saw it displayed on the shelves of capitalism, an uncontrollable impulse arose within you.
You want to save it, and you want to own it, but the cost of several thousand yuan makes you hesitate and hold back.
From then on, every night you toss and turn in bed, lonely and restless. Open your eyes, and its price is on your phone screen; close them, and its image fills your mind.
Finally, you grit your teeth and make up your mind—you plan to buy it home.
Before formally tasting it, you want to sample its scent first. Because you know that although it is an absolutely forbidden hallucinogenic poison, it is also a rich fragrance that makes everyone succumb.
So, you start greedily inhaling the hot exhaust air blowing from its vents.
The mixed scent of plastic, metal, and chemical solvents rolling in your nasal cavity is the signature fragrance proving it's brand new. The heat dissipating in your lungs shows it's trying its hardest to please you.
If someone says gaming is addictive, I firmly disagree—I slack off and play games at work every day, and I haven't gotten addicted, have I?
But if someone says inhaling Steam Deck cooling exhaust is addictive, I can only agree—who wouldn't want to play games every day while pressing their nose against the vent, taking epic lungfuls with frantic enthusiasm?
The depressing copy above involves artistic exaggeration, but it indeed reflects the real situation for many people after buying a Steam Deck.
In early 2022, Valve began shipping Steam Decks to players who had pre-ordered. Many players discovered something strange while using their Steam Decks—the hot air blowing from the top exhaust port really smelled unusually good.
Some say it smells like artificial leather, others say it's more like the scent of motor oil diffused in a gas station, and some think it's the chemical sweetener used in synthetic fruits from the cyberpunk era.
Although debates about the smell never ceased, no one questioned its efficacy—one whiff refreshes the mind, two whiffs banish fatigue forever, and three whiffs seem to grant immortality.
Thus, "inhaling Steam Deck exhaust" became a lasting meme in the player community—every newcomer who gets a Steam Deck receives a friendly reminder from veterans: "The Steam Deck isn't just a handheld console; it's also an air freshener. Don't forget to sniff its exhaust port often; you'll definitely get addicted."
It can be said that Steam Deck exhaust to players is like catnip to Hajimi (cats).
Even Hajimi (cats) would treat Steam Deck exhaust like catnip.
Even though Valve advised players not to inhale too much, it only resulted in them going even further.
Recently, some Steam Deck players began to feel that if you just inhale with your nose, a large portion of the cooling exhaust escapes into the surrounding air, which is too wasteful. So, to maximize the use of Steam Deck's cooling exhaust, someone uploaded the blueprint for a "Steam Deck Exhaust Sniffer" to a 3D printing model website. The function of the Steam Deck Exhaust Sniffer is simple—it is specifically designed to collect and guide the Steam Deck's cooling exhaust, allowing 100% of it to enter the user's lungs.
Although the Steam Deck Exhaust Sniffer model looks silly, somewhat like a gadget for people with specific fetishes, this doesn't prevent it from serving its original purpose, or even killing two birds with one stone—we call that efficiency.
We're not sure if the uploader designed the Steam Deck Exhaust Sniffer as just a joke, but many Steam Deck players treasured it, actually using their home 3D printers to create and use the sniffer.
Of course, it's mainly used on the upper body.
And so, the "Steam Deck Exhaust Sniffer," carrying the "inhaling Steam Deck exhaust" meme, rose to greatness again. Countless players printed tools overnight, just to quickly enjoy undiluted cooling exhaust. Since then, the new games preloaded on the machines went untouched for a long time, engaged couples living together seemed to be in a long-distance relationship, and the black masks worn on their faces day and night brought back memories of the Dingdong Ji era.
Some players even demanded further improvements, asking designers to iterate on the model to make it more convenient, automated, and ergonomic.
Looking at the players' intoxicated and indulgent comments, one can only say that the addictiveness of Steam Deck exhaust doesn't seem fake. Even if it were fake, it has been made real through repetition.
One of the ten great unsolved mysteries of "Jackie Chan Adventures"—"Why does Bull never take off his mask?"—has finally been answered.
Hidden beneath Bull's mask is the Steam Deck Exhaust Sniffer.
Don't think this is nonsense—after all, in nearly a hundred episodes of "Jackie Chan Adventures," Bull never denied this fact.
Faced with Steam Deck exhaust, some enjoy it, while others feel confused and worried.
They believe the exhaust is not only pungent but terrifying, containing harmful substances capable of killing billions of cells. Inhaling the exhaust is akin to embracing cancer early and speedrunning "Earth Online."
They predict that in a few years, photos of the lungs of exhaust addicts will be posted in medical textbooks, with a caption below reading: "A gamer continuously inhaled excessive amounts of handheld console exhaust; these are the changes in their lungs."
But more people pretend not to understand, or see through the nature of the exhaust, yet still bravely choose to love it.
They are like steadfast martyrs, knowing the path ahead is thorny, yet they embark on this pilgrim's journey without hesitation. Every breath is a devout tribute to the Machine Spirit.
Rather than worrying about the consequences, enjoy the moment. We in the gaming world have our own "Big Fruit TV."
Of course, besides the Steam Deck, many other electronic products have a unique smell when brand new.
Take the Switch, which also has cooling vents but was released earlier. The cooling exhaust it produces during operation also leaves many players unable to resist.
On the other hand, there are quite a few players who cannot stand being disturbed by the pungent smell emitted from the cooling vents while immersed in games.
If you trace it back further, you'll find that discussions about the "smell of new electronic products" existed on the internet long before. From past to present, enthusiasts of electronic products have been debating this topic—whether the unique smell of new electronics is pleasant or foul, and what components it actually contains.
But so far, it seems no professionals have conducted a comprehensive survey on this.
Rather, the types of electronic products are diverse, and the materials and manufacturing processes required for each product vary. However, generally speaking, these smells likely come mainly from volatiles of trace plastics and chemical materials. As usage time increases, the volatiles remaining in the electronic products gradually decrease, and the "new" smell consequently "deteriorates." As for whether these volatiles are safe, there seems to be no unified conclusion across different electronic products.
So why do the volatiles from new electronic products feel "good to inhale"?
This is probably unrelated to "additives," and more likely related to one's past experiences—many people, upon smelling new electronic products, recall their past encounters with electronics. This scent can evoke pleasant memories, naturally making it easy to develop subconscious affection and dependence.
By the way, some perfume brands have long sensed business opportunities in the scarcity and brevity of the smell of brand-new electronic products, launching perfumes inspired by the scent of electronics.
So it seems that many players today loving to inhale the cooling exhaust from gaming devices, and even using 3D-printed Steam Deck Exhaust Sniffers to assist, is not hard to understand.
What everyone is smelling isn't the volatile substances in new electronic products, but the memory of encountering it for the first time.
But if you ask me, if you really want an epic lungful, one Steam Deck and a sniffer aren't enough. You should get a mineral water bottle, poke some holes in it, and plug a dozen Steam Decks into it to inhale in a row.
Of course, this is just a joke. A final reminder to everyone:
For the sake of your health and to play more games, if you haven't started inhaling, quit now. It's best not to inhale at all.